I am sporadically packing. This involves shovelling all clothes from the wardrobe and leaving them heaped across the room, whilst sitting at the desk sighing and making uninspired lists. So far it looks like this:

• Top - stripes in blue and grey
• Top – blue
• Top – black
• Top –black #2
• Top – scary frog picture
• Top – olive green

I won’t get far this way. I need some motivation. A packing song, which conveniently combines upbeat music with lyrics listing the obvious things to take on holiday. Last time I left without socks and contact lens solution. I am mentally preparing myself for the worse case scenario – forgetting underwear.
The reason for the sighing is that I have only two books (The Historian – Elizabeth Kostova, and The Accidental – Ali Smith). This is a dilemma. I will never make two books stretch over two weeks. I am sitting here chewing my fingernails and imagining an almost bookless holiday.

(For those of you who don’t know, I am going to Germany for two weeks to see a friend for one week, and to stay with my grandma/family the second. I have been homesick for a year, and only just realised. Can I call it homesickness? That’s how it feels, but there must be some other word for it.)

Don’t go away! There will be amusing things for you to read even with me gone. I have not one, but two, guest-bloggers, in the shape and form of Elisabeth Ice Cream, and Grumpy Old Matt, who will start blogging on Thursday. Big welcome, and lots of comments!

I shall send you all virtual marzipan icecream and sourkraut from Germany. (Warning: Not to be eaten together, may cause convulsions and sickness.)