I will do the unthinkable, and dedicate this post entirely to football. I will then do the even more unthinkable, and go further in dedicating this post to the BANNING of any future mention of football on this blog. You are sitting there in shock. Or indignation. "Why do such a thing?" I hear you query, your voice containing a "tint" of audible panic, your eyes widening in disbelief.

Despite the fact that I have a bet on with The Boyfriend that if England and Germany play, Germany will win, I don't particulary understand what the fuss is about. A few sweaty, ridiculously overpaid men kicking a round object around a patch of grass. And occassionally aiming the round object into a net-esque thing. And missing. Or scoring. Either way, the raised blood-pressure/tears/drinking oneself into the gutter/screams of delight are NOT WORTH IT!

The two flags on the car: Why?! Is one not enough? Going over 30 miles per hour, the car might very well take off.

The party tooter things: Why?! No-one has won yet. If you feel the need to sit infront of the screen with a red and white tube dangling out of your mouth at 3AM, please refrain from blowing into it. I know the temptation must be overwhelming. The round object comes close to passing into the net-esque thing. And misses. You take advantage of the tube dangling from your mouth, and blow into into it in frustration. My ears bleed.